UncNucProTuncphatkid.art/UNC

[ paper free zine ]

Karma Creates Paranoid, Profoundly Sick Society

Unchecked Corruption, Greed Threaten Dismantling 250 Year-Old Crumbling Facade

Across Corporate America, Old Glory hangs inverted; reasons are mixed, reflecting who stands in her shadow. A once, hand-sewn, homegrown symbol, now bears the sweat of laborers who stitch "Made in China" tucked into her cleavage. Boob sweat stench covers the truth, and patriotism perverts such fetishes, anyway. In this economy? You're lucky if your friends gas you up! What, did you think plastic was made from corn? Don't even get into the topic of cotton. History doesn't repeat, but it rhymes, and that alone is treasonous. If only you were an expert in forensics, you'd find hemp rope knotted into a safety net. You can't even get past the metal detectors. You better wait in the lobby, if you can afford a shell LLC. Fuck it, bro, send your hate mail to uncnuc@phatkid.art and we will publish the most relevant and/or disturbing among them(you)!

Two Months of Antibiotic Resistant Fungus Throbbing Fruiting Bodies from Viral Content

Uno Dos Tres Quatro - Zero is the other way.

Issue #01 - FREE BE

Do you feel healthy yet? Fertilizer is made from waste products, and you have to buy those from overseas. We don't make those here. Seeds are patented to contain glyphosate. Badabababa You're lovin' it! Baaaaaaah. Baaaaaah. Moo?

You're on Camera

Everything you do is a balloon; Learn how to use AI or become a commodity. When that bubble pops, dear God, the pus that oozes from it will be aromatic. Your tax dollars are hoovered into warehouses and homeless camps occupied by the very foundation we jack-hammered and painted blue. Wait, I thought we liked red. Mix them together and you get royal purple, and that's the direction we are going now. Let them eat high fructose corn syrup molded into apple pie with glow-in-the-dark cheese. I thought plastic was made from oil? What's the difference.

Resources

You're Fired!

It turns out, apple turnovers are overrated. Have you ever baked a grapefruit from the food bank? The sugar caramelizes into candy. Don't tell the nuns, though. All that organic food was getting tossed, anyway. If you try to take it from the dumpster, we'll call the cops! You have to wait in line with the Ensigns. That's a nuclear-powered ship, by the way. Have some irradiated meat and shut up.

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I really can't stop the vivid American dreams that haunt my sleep. They make pills for that, or you can do walking meditation, breathing in the exhaust fumes, taking note of the rage that came tethered to the invention of the wheel. Don't step on the grass. It's protected with bullets engraved by shaky whisky fingers.
The Cost of AI - This eZine remains AI free, and runs on redacted and coffee and black tea with honey. If you are not a robot, you can donate.
Good morning. How do you like your coffee? The same way I like my women, of course. Covered in bees!